Broken Hearts

here is an update that Randy sent out late Saturday night. Please keep him and all our Haitian brothers and sisters continually in your prayers.

Many hearts are broken... ours included.

Well, its 10:00pm on Saturday night, as I begin to write this little update. I am sitting inside, which is a little unnerving, but all the doors are open in case i need to make a quick exit. We have had more aftershocks today, that are not that big, but when the ground is moving under your feet for about 30 seconds, my brain keeps telling me thats not normal. It sends my heart through the roof every time. Anyway, I thought I would send a brief update so that you could know our prayer requests, and know a little of our situation. This is hard to write because I have so many emotions that are coming up, and my nerves are fried right now.

I feel so incredibly thankful - my family was spared, Kim was safe, our visitors John and Jim were with us and were spared, everyone was out of the school at the time, the earthquake didn't happen at night when there are a ton of locks to unlock just to get outside, that a lot of our friends are safe, that God put it in our heart and made a way for the car-port to be taken down during the holidays, that my wife and child are safe in Canada right now, that my house, although it has a few cracks, it seems relatively safe, and my walls, which are very weak to the point of falling over, have not fallen over. I have so much praise and thanks to give to God.

I feel so fearful at times - fearful of violence getting out of hand, not being able to find students, or co-workers, or friends, fearful of the next aftershock, fearful that people won;t get enough food or water to survive, fearful that people are still trapped, fearful that my house might come down...

I feel so much pain - its hard to describe the pain that people are going through right now, pain of losing loved ones, pain of seeing all the destruction, pain of seeing so much death, and so many people grieving, the pain of not knowing - not knowing where someone is, or how they are,

I feel so much sorrow - my heart and head are just heavy,

I feel joy- joy in being able to share the gospel with people who need to know Jesus, joy in singing God's praises with neighbors i never knew before this, joy in living with all the guys who live with me now and seeing them work to help others and work to make sure that we are safe, joy in seeing Karen and Maia, and Kim, John and Jim making it safely home, joy in being reunited with freinds that i didn't know what happened to them, joy in knowing that my sins are forgiven and that if I perish - that i am with my Lord and Saviour.

I feel grace...this is hard to explain, but we could have all perished - it is by God's grace alone that we are alive.

So many emotions, admist such a great disaster.

We have spent the last few days finding students, connecting with other organizations to see how we can work together, delivering medical supplies to clinics around the area, distributing clothes and supplies to feilds of people, finding supplies so we can survive.

We lost two good friends and co-workers, Samuel Marcelin and Guerdeson, and that is very painful. I went and visited their families and grieved with them. I also was visiting families of students I knew had lost their lives. One of our grade 6 students was killed with his father, leaving 9 siblings behind. We found him as we watched his body being pulled from a building. I am just trying to encourage, comfort, and be with our students and their families and our co-workers. It is a difficult task but a beautiful one that the Lord has given to us. We don't have enough food and water to give them, or a place to stay, but we can minister to them and care for them the best we can. We suffer together and we encourage eachother to find our strength in the LORD alone.

We have been going through our storrage room where teams and people have donated supplies and these are coming in handy right now. The guys have been distributing clothing to the parks which are packed with people, and i have been able to supply a bunch of clinics with a lot of medical supplies. We don't have a lot, but what we do have is such i blessing. Next we will hand out all the toys we still have to the children who have lost everything, and then the rest of our 'Adoration' uniforms to those who need clothes.

We had a scare yesterday. The guys came home at night and said that nobody could locate Wisly, and then they said there was a smell coming from the school. I was almost sure that nobody was in the school, but my heart sank and was filled with so much grief. This morning we went to the school and started digging and searching. this was very difficult because the building is half fallen, held up by the neighbors wall and house. It could go anytime. So we checked in the places we thought he could be, and we couldn't see anything or find anything. Then I asked who had asked for him that didn't know where he was, and it was only one person, but not a family member, so we went to go find his family in cite soliel. The only problem was that it is very dangerous in cite soliel right now, and so i went to the UN base and asked for a UN escort to find Wisly, and they wouldn't do it, they only travel in packs and did not want to go into cite soliel. Then we drove to the police station in cite soliel and they said it was to dangerous for them to go out. So then we went by ourselves - Cadeau walked by himself the roughest part. And he found Wisly's sister who said that Wisly was safe and was staying with his mom. Praise the LORD!

There are quite a few students that i have not found yet, because everyone is everywhere. Most families are living in parks, or on the road or have left to the country side. As I was dropping of medical supplies at a clinic I found one of our kindergarten students at the clinic. He had a broken foot, as the wall had come down on it. His mom was a cousin of Guerdson, and i had to inform her that Guerdeson had passed into glory. So much pain and sorrow.

There are truck loads of dead bodies being removed from the city. The roads are lined with the bodies, and the smell is pretty bad. But people are banding together and working to help out. People are mourning together and living together in parks and in the streets. Because all have lost so much, and because all are affected there seems to be a unity here that was not here before. At the same time, other people are getting desperate and the violence has started - looting, stealing, gun shots; it is definitely all around us. There is a definite fear in the air that things will get tough, and then violent.

We are so thankful to hear that countries are sending Aid and sending troups to try to control the city and bring relief. We have heard so many planes landing, and i have seen many trucks leaving the air port with supplies. I have been to the Canadian embassy a lot this past week and have seen the soldiers come in, the medical supplies, and the different teams and organizations that have come to help. This gives us much hope - because much help is needed.

Right now we are still sleeping outside. We will go back inside once all the after shocks are over, and i don;t know when that will be.

We are holding services every night in the street right now. We just take our chairs, go sit outside, walk around and invite all our neighbors to come join us, and then we start singing. Then we share scripture, and pray. It is a beautiful time. A time for us to lament together, to the LORD, a time to pray for others, a time to heal, and a time to bring Adoration. That is our main focus right now - ministering to people; being willing and ready to pray with people, share the gospel, and to comfort people, and give them hugs. We pray that the LORD would give us strength to do this. I woke up on Thursday morning and was praying and asking God how i could best help people. He really put it upon my heart that I was to minsiter to their spiritual needs - the need to repent, to turn to him, and in the midst of pain and devestation not to turn away from God, but to find our hope and comfort in Him alone. I talked to the guys that morning that that was to be our focus - working hard, but the main part was ministering - listening, grieving, helping, sharing with them, but also prayer and Bible reading. That afternoon, I approached a man on the street who was just sitting there, who looked like he couldn't go on. He was a deportee, in jail for years in the States, and in a lot of trouble in Haiti. He was deeply shaken by the events that have happened and God opened up a door for me to share the gospel with him, and pray for him. He wants Jesus in his life, but has no idea how that works. Anyway, it was a blessed time. Please pray for Willice Fidel Mendez and his family that they may turn to Christ. We have met many neighbors by just singing in the streets and asking them if they want to join us. Please pray that God would put it on people's hearts to come out and join us. And pray for my team - these guys are young, and are shaken, and are scared. They need a lot of prayer. The guys at the house are Cadeau, Samuel, Max, Yder, and John. Roland and his son are moving in too, as his family is moving to the country side to be safe. And we have other guys that help us during the day - Allyn, Evenz,Deigo, and Silly.

Anyway, thank-you for praying for us. We are greatly encouraged by you and we need your prayers.

I want to leave you with Psalm 46, "God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way, though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam, and though the mountains tremble at its swelling.....Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I wil be exalted in the earth!" The LORD of hosts is with us, the God of Jacob is our fortress!"

In His Service and In His Grip of grace,

Randy